“By cultivating attitudes of friendliness toward the happy, compassion for the unhappy, delight in the virtuous and disregard toward the wicked, the mind-stuff retains its undisturbed calmness.”

I am re-reading The Yoga Sutras of Patanjali with the translation and commentary done by Sri Swami Satchidananda and this particular sutra really stuck out to me. According this sutra, from my perspective, it seems as though we can put the mind of others into four different categories. The first one is the Happy.

What does “The Happy” mean? Let’s explore that. We all have different things that make us happy. What if someone’s version of happy is the result from their wickedness? I think we can all agree that for that person, they would be considered wicked. For the happy, Patanjali says to have the attitude of friendliness. Friendliness doesn’t have to go very deep. We can give anyone a smile or a nod. We can smile at the two lovers who are holding hands, or the friends that are getting coffee. We went to dinner during my last trip to Florida. While at dinner we were seated between two unhappy people. The unhappy people had a very happy group sitting next to them. The happy people were being loud, enjoying their time and the company they had. The unhappy people were taking videos of them complaining to the staff. What I saw was family getting together and enjoying each others company. The two unhappy groups were not able to enjoy their dinner because they could not focus on anything other than getting the happiness from the other group to stop. What causes unhappy people to want the happy just as unhappy as them?

The unhappiness spoke about here is a constant state of being, not a temporary feeling. For unhappy people Patanjali suggests treating them with compassion. Compassion for their situation, and the choices they are unable to stop making. We can all feel unhappy from time to time. I think its most important to not project our unhappiness. To instead acknowledge it and decide what you would like to do with that unhappiness. For others that are unhappy, we look to them with compassion. Sri Swami Satchidananda commented that for unhappy people they have their own karma. At times we may not fully understand exactly what that karma is or where it came from. What we can do in this lifetime is try to create favorable karma as a gift to ourselves. For other people, we help when we can. If we can share what we have created, we should share. “Whether our mercy is going to help others or not, by our own feeling of mercy, at least we are helped.” Sri Swami Satchidananda. This is not to say put yourself in a position of unhappiness to help another. Its to say share what you can. Do what you can, and do not hurt yourself in the process. That is very important.

For the virtuous, it is suggested to treat them with delight. The person that you wish to be like in some way, treat them with delight, not envy. Be delighted that you get to experience that persons art, their wealth, their existence in whatever way that looks. They could be your inspiration. Your muse. Be delightful for their successes. A wicked person is not able to look at the virtuous with delight.

For a wicked person, it is suggested that our attitude be indifference. Sri Swami Satchidananda shared a story that he was told as a small child from the Panca Tantra.

“One rainy day, a monkey was sitting on a tree branch getting completely drenched. Right opposite on another branch of the same tree there was a small sparrow sitting in it’s hanging nest. Normally a sparrow builds its nest on the edge of a branch so it can hang down and swing around gently in the breeze. It has a nice cabin inside with an upper chamber, a reception room, a bedroom down below and even a delivery room if its going to give birth to little ones. Oh yes, you should see and admire a sparrow’s nest sometime. It was warm and cozy inside its nest and the sparrow peeped out and, seeing the poor monkey, said, “Oh, my dear friend, I am so small; I don’t even have hands like you, only a small beak. But with only that I built a nice house, expecting this rainy day. Even if the rain continues for days, I will be warm inside. I heard Darwin saying that you are the forefather of human beings, so why don’t you use your brain? Build a nice, small hut somewhere to protect yourself during the rain.” You should have seen the face of the monkey. It was terrible! “Oh, you little devil! How dare you advise me? Because you are warm and cozy in your nest you are teasing me. Wait, you will see where you are!” The monkey proceeded to tear the nest to pieces, and the poor bird had to fly out and get drenched like the monkey.” Sir Swami Satchidananda in The Yoga Sutras of Patanjali

The wicked will not only be upset by your happiness but will destroy it if your happiness is noticed by them. Which is why it is best to treat them with disregard. But how do you know if you are dealing with a wicked person? Sometimes we come across people like this. They believe you are proud and insulting when your intentions are to help. They twist your words, make you question yourself, don’t allow you to have boundaries. They try to tell you how you feel instead of trying to get to know how you feel. There are many ways to tell when you are dealing with a wicked person, you just have to listen. Just like in this story, you helping could mean them tearing what you have built apart. It is suggested to stay away from these people. Even if you sense potential of wickedness, stay away and disregard them.

This sutra is helpful for all of us. Not just those practicing yoga and spirituality, but as a baseline for all of us. Treat the happy with a friendliness attitude, the unhappy with compassion, the virtuous with delight, and the wicked with disregard. When we use these methods, we are unable to be upset. Keeping our minds serene and peaceful. Allowing us to grow where we need, to breathe, and slow down, calming our nervous system.

Book Recommendation: The Yoga Sutras of Patanjali Translated and Commentary by Sri Swami Satchidananda.