Food, Earth, connection

Today, I noticed my food for what seemed like the first time. Sitting on the back porch, the sun shining on my legs, the shade covering my eyes. Maybe I noticed because I am reading Collin Hartley Woke Up by John L Murphy. Maybe it's because I have been practicing presence in the small, blissful moments usually taken for granted. Maybe it was the nice weather. I looked down at my spinach, cabbage, shredded carrots, beans, with seasoning and lemon dressing. I noticed most parts of this meal came directly from the earth. No modification, no processing. Just plants that were connected to earth before landing on my plate and in my body. 

I see the plethora of cookbooks as I walk into the kitchen. Collection is probably closer to the term I am looking for. From Sugar Detox by Diane Sanfilippo to Thug Kitchen Party Grub. I see Eat to Live by Joel Fuhrman, M.D. for what feels like the first time. Cookbooks in the past have been something that I haven't followed fully. I made a recipe here and there and enjoyed it, or feed it to the dog because I did something wrong. I was looking at my food as nutrition. Something to fuel my body or “satisfy” my taste buds. I didn’t see the connection that I saw today. 

Diets have worked for me as much as they can. Thinking of my food from the moral and health aspect has formed this foundation I have for my lifestyle. I wasn’t aware I hit a wall until today. Unaware I needed something deeper to understand the parts of the cookbooks I didn’t read.

My moment of sitting in the sun, phone somewhere unknown. Disconnected for a small period of time, fully present for the food I eat, grounded to the earth I enjoy. I realized I can eat to feel connected. Knowing that right before eating this food, they were grounded in the exact earth that I love. I feel connected to her. I feel disconnected when I eat something that is so far away from her. When I eat processed foods, I find I am just eating to eat. Hardly paying attention to what I eat. Mindlessly taking away the opportunity to feel connected and grounded within myself.

I look at the jars of the dried herbs on the shelf. Tea is a way to help me feel connected. When life gets overwhelming, I make a cup of tea and drink the juice the leaves and roots produced. Tea brings me closer to our earth which means closer to myself. Encouraging me to feel grounded. This Earth holds us all together, connects every single one of us and so much more. The energy I receive when I eat or drink foods directly from her, is like the nourishment you get as a baby through your mothers milk. This nourishment comes from a mother that provides throughout the entire existence. Compared to her, we are just all babies anyways. Our human mothers will be able to give a part of themselves. They are human though, with their own set of needs that do not deserve to be neglected. The earth is here to provide and provide fully. To feel her connection is to feel the energy of something bigger than ourselves. I didn’t recognize before that I wasn’t seeing my plate. I looked at the food that nourishes my body without opening my eyes. I was sleeping while I ate, fooling myself into thinking I was awake. Taken away from experiencing the food that fuels this vessel I carry. The vessel that allows me to experience this life. It’s not about missing out on life by not eating processed foods. I now see that isn’t missing out at all. Eating processed foods isn’t living. It’s going through a motion that is comfortable to us. Processed foods disconnect us from who we are and from the energy the earth provides. Processed foods are another way for us to give ourselves the excuse to live life sleeping.

I am excited to challenge myself when I eat my cookie or the French fries I love. Excited to feel the energy that's missing. Before I took out cheese from my diet, I had strong opinions about how one was not truly living without queso. Once I watched two minutes of a video from the dairy industry, that thought disappeared faster than I could perceive. I no longer saw queso as a way of life. Instead, I felt unbelievable sadness for the mother cows crying for the babies that have been taken away from them. I no longer saw the pain I inflicted through the lens of my taste buds as a way of life. I saw it taking life away. I saw my consumption of dairy as me encouraging the destruction of an energy I admire. So, by bringing awareness to this connection, I am excited to feel the differences when I eat that cookie dough. I am excited to challenge myself in bringing awareness to what I eat. I have been disconnected by preconceived thoughts someone once told me. Believing what they said was law instead of questioning their authority on the subject. The subject of the self. “You must get XYZ grams of protein, you must eat this to be healthy, eat that to have energy” I believe what we eat is individual to each and every human. Some foods that hurt me, may be very beneficial to your body. I have my own dietary rules I created and follow. It is my intention to encourage you to find yours. What works for me, doesn't have to look the same as what works for you. I ask myself;

Do I feel connected to the life this Earth gives when I eat the food on my plate? 

And then I leave it as just that. I take out the rest of the dieting questions that aren’t mine. I will work on not sleeping while I eat. Mindlessly and inauthentically. I want to connect, to feel, and be aware. To live in that moment of enjoying the connection instead of thinking about the future “What will this food get me?” In the United States, we are not living in a time that we need to worry about where the next meal will come from; in a primal way. I am not saying that I will never eat French fries again (yes, I am listing all my weaknesses, cookies and French fries) I am saying I enjoy this feeling of connection with the Earth through the foods I eat. That it brings me joy to have another way to feel connected to those around me, to the planet, and most of all, to myself. 

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